Phobia

I'm scared. After that incident, a wall has been built up ever since. I can't seem to break the wall down.. I just can't easily let my guards down anymore. It's not that I don't trust you but because I've been hurt so badly this time round.. In fact, this is the first time that I've been really hurt, not physically but emotionally. Don't get me wrong, I still love you.. And honestly, I've never loved someone so much before.. So much that I'm willing to give you anything or everything. Even my friends can tell that. There are so many "what ifs" in my mind right now.. There's like a scar in my heart. So afraid that I might get hurt again. So afraid that it has all been a lie, right from the start. I just wish I was a little stronger. I wish I wouldn't even cry over this, I wish my heart was as strong as a steel..